Armchair lawyers

Sitting in a witness stand, under oath, under penalty of perjury, I would have to admit the following:

  • I have never used my company’s antivirus software in my own computer.
  • The software offered for free by my company to its Internet subscribers is a very basic version of the software its manufacturer offers for sale in the stores. It is not as good as the retail version.
  • It will not protect your computer fully. More times than I want to admit, it has failed to detect such rogue scarewares as Antivirus 2009.

The prosecution rests, Your Honor. I have now made mincemeat of my testimony in favor of my company’s antivirus software as thoroughly as any “armchair lawyer” among my customers can ever hope to. As a tech supporter, I am a blatant liar, and my company’s antivirus software is worthless.

That being said, I detest those customers who come at me like Perry Mason. The protection of their personal data is important, to be sure, but does it warrant badgering me to find out to what products I would trust my own machine?

Let me clarify some of the above statements. I don’t fare very well when asked for a Brand X vs. Brand Y comparison of antivirus softwares. I use AVAST, and I’ve used Panda at one time, and nothing else. I know nothing of other products. I don’t think there’s a tech supporter on the planet who is as well-versed in all the products as to be able to give the point-by-point comparison of the capabilities of all the softwares that some customers want. If there is, why is he still working for less than $10 an hour?

The reason I use AVAST is because it’s home version is free, not because it is best. I’ve never really suffered a real infection under it, but that could be more out of staying out of movie and music sharing web sites than anything the software is doing for me. I don’t know where customers get this myth that tech supporters use certain products because they’re the best, and you can trust whatever it is they use in their own machines. The “use what your doctor uses” general wisdom.

I’m not a doctor. I’m more like a guy who has a good working knowledge of first aid.


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